in which the author discusses her general distaste for the word beautiful
co-edited by my pulchritudinous sister.
This is going to be an odd and complicated post, I can feel it. So, maybe just don't read too deeply into it. It's just some thoughts that have been on my mind for a while.
I'm less than fond of hearing the word beautiful applied to myself.
Silly, right?
But let meexplain attempt to explain.
Remember the days when everyone was fighting for guys to stop calling girls "hot" and call them "beautiful" instead? I suppose those are still going on, but I hear about it much less often. Well, probably largely due to the good intentions above, beautiful is now the only word I ever hear. It's quite rapidly losing it's meaning.
Don't get me wrong, there are times when hearing that word makes me levitate with giddiness. But it's very, very rare.
Most people don't mean much with 'beautiful.' They really mean pretty, or nice, or they know it's what is expected. There's not a lot of thought put into it; it's the conditioned response. You can always tell when they mean something with it - it shows in their voice, or their eyes. There's something different about how the word tastes from some people. That's when it becomes a special word again. Very few people say it like that.
Beautiful has become generic. Overuse is dangerous. As C.S. Lewis said, "Don't use words too big for the subject. Don't say 'infinitely' when you mean 'very'; otherwise you'll have no word left when you want to talk about something really infinite." [I admit my guilt of this in many cases!] The English language consists of somewhere around 250,000 words, and that's on the conservative side. Why limit yourself?!
There are so many wonderful choices. Ravishing. Stunning. Alluring. (wouldn't you love to be told you had allure?) Exquisite. Radiant. Pulchritudinous. Side note: if a man who has not read this post spontaneously called me pulchritudinous, I would first look at him askance, and then declare my undying love. Most likely. End side note. Enchanting. Adorable. Breathtaking. Striking. Fetching. Captivating. Rapturous. Heavenly. Lovely. Desirable. Magnificent. Head-turning. Darling.
I am intentionally not including gorgeous, because it is my most overused adjective. Guilty!
I remember blushing when a boy mentioned my being "all gussied up." I can remember where I was going, what I was wearing, how my hair was, even what time of day it was. It sticks out that much! It doesn't take alot, really. Just something out of the ordinary, something with thought. Even cute is preferable to beautiful, just because beautiful is so often insincere.
Alternatively, don't tell me I look beautiful, but be specific. Tell me my outfit is flattering, or admire my hair shining in the sunset or my glowing skin, be entranced by my dark, flashing eyes, or verbalize how my heels make my legs look nice. (ha! maybe not on a first date) Say something nice and specific, instead of slopping it all together under one label. Or if you really can't pick, express it genuinely! Don't let beautiful be a cop out. (And don't just pick some feature so you sound sincere. We can see through that, too.) And don't comment on how dainty my teeth are. Please.
So, in and of itself, beautiful is not bad. Don't think I'm condemning the word on it's own merit. I merely draw attention to the intentions behind the usage, and the availability of such charming options.
After all, though, it's the thought that counts.
Also: if you would like a very humorous (at least to us) insight into how this goes from my semi-organized thoughts to the gem of internet literature that you see before you, listen here. No judging. And here's the second half, oops.
This is going to be an odd and complicated post, I can feel it. So, maybe just don't read too deeply into it. It's just some thoughts that have been on my mind for a while.
I'm less than fond of hearing the word beautiful applied to myself.
Silly, right?
But let me
Remember the days when everyone was fighting for guys to stop calling girls "hot" and call them "beautiful" instead? I suppose those are still going on, but I hear about it much less often. Well, probably largely due to the good intentions above, beautiful is now the only word I ever hear. It's quite rapidly losing it's meaning.
Don't get me wrong, there are times when hearing that word makes me levitate with giddiness. But it's very, very rare.
Most people don't mean much with 'beautiful.' They really mean pretty, or nice, or they know it's what is expected. There's not a lot of thought put into it; it's the conditioned response. You can always tell when they mean something with it - it shows in their voice, or their eyes. There's something different about how the word tastes from some people. That's when it becomes a special word again. Very few people say it like that.
Beautiful has become generic. Overuse is dangerous. As C.S. Lewis said, "Don't use words too big for the subject. Don't say 'infinitely' when you mean 'very'; otherwise you'll have no word left when you want to talk about something really infinite." [I admit my guilt of this in many cases!] The English language consists of somewhere around 250,000 words, and that's on the conservative side. Why limit yourself?!
There are so many wonderful choices. Ravishing. Stunning. Alluring. (wouldn't you love to be told you had allure?) Exquisite. Radiant. Pulchritudinous. Side note: if a man who has not read this post spontaneously called me pulchritudinous, I would first look at him askance, and then declare my undying love. Most likely. End side note. Enchanting. Adorable. Breathtaking. Striking. Fetching. Captivating. Rapturous. Heavenly. Lovely. Desirable. Magnificent. Head-turning. Darling.
I am intentionally not including gorgeous, because it is my most overused adjective. Guilty!
I remember blushing when a boy mentioned my being "all gussied up." I can remember where I was going, what I was wearing, how my hair was, even what time of day it was. It sticks out that much! It doesn't take alot, really. Just something out of the ordinary, something with thought. Even cute is preferable to beautiful, just because beautiful is so often insincere.
Alternatively, don't tell me I look beautiful, but be specific. Tell me my outfit is flattering, or admire my hair shining in the sunset or my glowing skin, be entranced by my dark, flashing eyes, or verbalize how my heels make my legs look nice. (ha! maybe not on a first date) Say something nice and specific, instead of slopping it all together under one label. Or if you really can't pick, express it genuinely! Don't let beautiful be a cop out. (And don't just pick some feature so you sound sincere. We can see through that, too.) And don't comment on how dainty my teeth are. Please.
So, in and of itself, beautiful is not bad. Don't think I'm condemning the word on it's own merit. I merely draw attention to the intentions behind the usage, and the availability of such charming options.
After all, though, it's the thought that counts.
Also: if you would like a very humorous (at least to us) insight into how this goes from my semi-organized thoughts to the gem of internet literature that you see before you, listen here. No judging. And here's the second half, oops.
Comments
Post a Comment